“Oh, no I never diet” she says as she orders the salad with the dressing on the side, pushes the bread basket away, avoids the alcohol, orders black coffee which she gulps between mouthfuls of food, casually pushes the uneaten cheese to the side of the plate, and refuses the dessert saying she is full. But no, she is not on a diet.
She drinks copious amounts of black coffee all day, eats nothing even though she has a gnawing hunger. At 6pm she eats tons of food. She is on a lifestyle plan not a diet.
When she travels to other countries, she opts for fast food places, she is familiar with the calorie count of each item. She prefers this structure; she is not on a diet.
When she wakes up, she goes to the bathroom and she weighs herself. That number will dictate her food plans for the day. But she is not on a diet.
We convince ourselves, in so many ways, that we are not dieting and we have it under control. Hey, we weigh the right amount according to all our guidelines (the scales, the gym, the doctor, our BMI) and that means we have it under control.
I convinced myself that this angst I felt all the time was OK. Especially if I had the right number on the scale.
I know the difference now. Food is nourishing and healing, but if my relationship with it is not, it never will be.
You are still on a diet if:
1. You measure yourself by a scale and weigh yourself frequently
2. You eat according to strict time lines
3. You have ‘good’ and ‘bad’ foods
4. You talk and think about food all the time. You know all the latest diets and your Instagram and Facebook likes are full of thin people
5. You judge other people’s bodies as much as your own
6. You exercise to keep your weight down and to be able to eat more. You will often do vigorous exercise after a binge
7. Food is generally not pleasurable to you.
8. Hunger has to be controlled at all times.
9. You can’t recognize the different signals for hunger
10. You are always a few pounds away from your perfect weight
11. You feel if you don’t have a rigid structure in place you will lose control
12. Your body is often a cause of annoyance, an imperfection to be dealt with (you obsess over the tweaks you could make)
13. You count and measure food
14. Coffee, diet sodas are often used to curb hunger
There are many more signs. Many more.
Please see my post about ‘Normal Eating’, to know the difference.
Once I took the pledge not to diet again, the biggest part was changing the mentality and the behaviors. It is like any recovery journey: a life time path.
It is a glorious journey full of empowerment and liberation and a chance to claim yourself, to truly belong to yourself.
“True belonging is the spiritual practice of believing in and belonging to yourself so deeply that you can share your most authentic self with the world and find sacredness in both being a part of something and standing alone in the wilderness.” -Brené Brown.
Start belonging to yourself now. You are so worth it.
Thanks for reading
Christina